Stuck at a Crossroads

I’m getting to a point in my life where I feel constantly stuck.

There are so many avenues of life I want to explore, but I don’t think it is financially responsible of me to do so. For instance, I want to become a freelance writer and editor, but it’s difficult to do without some sort of credibility and background.

It’s difficult enough for anyone my age to find full-time jobs, but in the publishing industry, it’s even more difficult. I think out of the 32-person class I had last year in school, maybe 6 or 7 have been able to find full-time positions within the same industry. I’ve been working on contracts and will actually begin my first freelance spot in the new year (I’m hoping since it’s already been delayed once).

I’m sure this is a feeling that many other people have had. In fact, I was talking with a friend of mine in Australia who is going through something similar. He’s working part-time and going to school full-time but is still unsure about what he wants to do. At 25, it’s a scary thing to consider. I still have my doubts about my decision to go back to school and turned my full-time job into a part-time one, and then ultimately quitting to pursue contract positions.

It is also a scary notion that my boyfriend has talked about buying a house which is something I am certainly not able to do right now. I know he knows that, but he and I worked on my budget today in the hopes that I will be able to pay off the remaining loan on my car by the end of the current contract I’m on (which ends end of Feb/mid-March depending on the ski season). I really would love if we can make this a reality. That way, I can put more money towards my student loan and have that paid off much quicker.

I also wonder if my writing for this blog and starting to make videos for YouTube is worth my time and energy. I love to write, and creating my own blog helps to get rid of some stress in my head as well as share a lot of ideas that I have and projects that I’ve completed.

I think once I have finished my current contract, I can take time (because let’s face it, I’ll have nothing but time) to sit and construct a plan for myself and figure out goals I want to achieve. Until I am able to do so, I am going to stick to my new budget plan, and hope that I am able to pay off quite a bit of my debts until March.


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